Some of us find ourselves surrounded by family at this time of year. Some of us face these times of supposed joy alone, with no one to share in the revelry and laughter. Or, if there are people in our lives we could share the good times with, something stands in the way. Something, something, it’s always something, as the saying goes. Of all of the cliché sayings in the English language, that is one of the most truthful ones out there.
You could probably write it off as differences between the generations, differences in life experiences that lead to different conclusions. But is that really a justifiable excuse to have something standing in the way of the relationship you know can and should be, but won’t? Neither party really understands the other, and until both are willing to come forward with an open heart and an open mind, the relationship will stay stilted and never grow.
Changes are inevitable. I usually count off everything that has changed in the last year, either with me or the world around me, on New Year’s Eve. This year, I was not concerned with the changes that have been. As we start out in 2012, I am more concerned with the growth that is coming my way. Growth as a person, a writer, a Wiccan, those are my top three. Growth in these things will eventually result in evolution, a nice, scientific word for change. It happens all the time and yet it is still so hard to force it. Sometimes, you have to let it happen on its own. That relationship I was talking about earlier? I believe that falls under a change you cannot force.
Family that you do not chose, family that is chosen for you will never go away, and they should not unless it is healthier for all involved. What I mean to say is those family members who you do not necessarily get along with but that you know will always be in your life are to be cared for. And by that I mean, care for the relationship. If it is already on thin ice, walk softly. If that ice cracks, instead of just going for a pleasant swim, you might find yourself freezing to death or drowning in the aftermath of falling. You cannot force the ice to thaw and for everyone to be safely ashore when it does. It’s all in patience and timing and the realization that the change might never come for you and that particular family member or section of family members.
For me, even if the family members in question are standing in my path towards growth, I have to just find a path around them without knocking them flat on their arses. I am not a mountain mover and nor do I want to be. The mountain was meant to be kept in one place, but I wasn’t. Learning how to move around the mountain is part of that growth thing I was talking about, and it’s something we all have to work on from time to time.
Let me take this opportunity to say that in the coming year, I hope to improve this blog. It will be a weekly thing, Goddess willing, and I would love to improve to the point where it does not sound like the semi-annual ravings of a broke college kid, but like an enlightened, educated weekly column written by someone who knows what she is talking about and is exploring the questions of life and everything that entails. I’m not after New Year’s Resolutions, I’m after goals and growth.
Best wishes to readers for their New Year hopes and dreams!